Some Rules for Righters
  1. A sentence must a verb.
  2. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
  3. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
  4. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
  5. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
  6. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat).
  7. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
  8. Be more or less specific.
  9. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
  10. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
  11. No sentence fragments.
  12. Contractions aren't necessary 'n' shouldn't be used.
  13. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
  14. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than are mostly necessary; it's highly superfluous.
  15. One should NEVER generalise.
  16. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
  17. Don't use no double negatives.
  18. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
  19. One-word sentences ? Eliminate.
  20. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
  21. The passive voice is to be ignored.
  22. Eliminate, commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
  23. Never utilise a big word when substituting a diminutive one would be sufficient.
  24. Kill all exclamation points!!!
  25. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
  26. Understatement is always the absolutely best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
  27. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
  28. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
  29. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations".
  30. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
  31. Go around the barn at a high noon to avoid colloquialisms. Hey, man, don't be chatty.
  32. Who needs rhetorical questions ?
  33. Avoid "buzz-words", such integrated transitional scenarios complicate simplistic situations.
  34. Use spell-checkers allot.
  35. Puns are for children, not groan readers and righters.
  36. An finally Proofread carefully to see if you any words out, ans theb ude tje spl checkr agin.